7 weeks ago, I competed in a bouldering event. I fell from the top of the last boulder problem of the final round and landed directly on concrete on my left foot. I don’t think I even touched the mats. The pain was so intense; I ended up lying downon the floor, drooling and crying. I have sprained the other ankle before, this was nothing like it. I knew this time it was bad, but I kept hoping otherwise. My diagnostic is still not complete but I have a broken heel, damaged ligaments and I need to get an MRI to understand why my foot won’t move (it is stuck).
What this meant for my competition season is that I was going to miss all the major competitions. I missed regionals (eastern Canada), the Canadian national and I probably won’t be able to compete in the World cup in Toronto in June. I don’t want this to sound like I am whining, but it is just to put things in perspective. I am mentioning it because I had to grieve a little. I am lucky to have the people I coach competing so it gives me another sense of satisfaction.
For the last few years I have had this love-hate relationship with performance in general. I have always liked training and competitions but I have also felt tired from it at times, mainly because I feel like performance sometimes bring unbalanced behaviors. We focus so much on one thing that we miss out on so many other things. I like the perspective of Alain de Botton on success http://www.ted.com/talks/alain_de_botton_a_kinder_gentler_philosophy_of_success.html
This injury has forced me to take time off. The first few weeks I felt so much pain that even doing chin-ups was out of the question. No running, no walking, no core training, no nothing. I don’t recall being this still ever. I also told myself that since I was injured, it was a good time to take a full break and try to remain positive (even with the endorphins deficit). I have been pretty good about it (except some difficult times). It made me realize how much energy I put into exercising. All of the sudden I have more time for other things like friends, shows, reading, cooking. I am definitely learning a lot from this slower pace life.
But with all this said, I miss climbing, running and being outside so much…